Hello! My name is Igor Lapin, I am a professional pickup trainer. Today I will talk about how not to screw up in bed for the first time. Some men have such a complex - the fear that the first sex will not be successful or will not work out at all.
Fear arises for various reasons: some believe that they have a small penis, others that they have problems with erections. It gets ridiculous and the guy is afraid he won’t quickly find where to insert it.
Every second person has probably watched porn, but at the thought of real sex, some simply fall into despair, because in life everything is not the same as in the picture. First, let's take a closer look at the reasons for guys' fears and mistakes in sex.
Fear of first sex
Every person, faced with such a problem, experiences anxiety. Not only women, but men too. I would like to tell young people that you need to have a lot of patience if the girl is dear to you and you do not want to cause her pain or any inconvenience. Try to talk to the lady, find out what exactly scares her, maybe she is not ready yet, then postpone this activity for a while. Don't put pressure on her. Much also depends on the age of your companion. The younger the lady, the more complexes and prejudices will accompany her. The main task of a man is to relax a woman as much as possible, both physically and mentally. Girls, I would like to say that this issue, of course, should be approached thoughtfully and seriously; if you are overwhelmed by a feeling of fear, ask yourself whether you want intimacy with this particular man. Sometimes it happens that the problem lies here, the girl simply does not want a particular guy, even if she has been in a relationship with him for a long time. The physiological part might not have been involved before, and she felt comfortable communicating with him and spending time. But as soon as the conversation turned to intimacy, the girl could get scared. Therefore, before you decide to have intimacy with a man, especially for the first time, think carefully about whether this is the partner with whom you want intimacy.
Fear of first sex
In general, being afraid of first sex is natural for both guys and girls. A new partner, and especially the first, always causes excitement. We don’t know how a woman will behave, moreover, we don’t fully know how we will act ourselves. How can a guy not screw up the first time?
The most important thing is not to worry.
This is the root of all bad sexual experiences. To get rid of unnecessary worries, you need to understand their causes and figure out how serious or insignificant they are.
I have a small penis
Many men have complexes about the size of their device.
As a rule, this happens because virgins watch a lot of porn, where all the actors have huge abs. It just so happens that pornography has its own standards, but this does not mean that all women need a giant penis. On the contrary, in life, most girls are afraid of sex with those with a large penis. The fact is that the average depth of the vagina is no more than 12 centimeters. And a penis longer than 15 centimeters can cause discomfort and even pain.
Of course, everyone’s body structure is different and you need to choose a partner wisely, in accordance with your height and physique.
You need to accept yourself: a penis cannot be pumped up or grown. We are born the way we are and we must understand this. Hi, friend! Especially for you, I have prepared a course “Schoolboy. Basics of Pickup" for only 490 rubles! Follow the link and order —> Another important point is that a girl’s satisfaction from sex does not depend at all on the size of your penis, but on the ability to excite her, move correctly
, etc. Therefore, you should never have a complex about this.
What if I can't get it up
Erection problems can indeed occur, even among those who have never had them. And this happens precisely because of the excitement about this. Ironic, right? To keep your penis standing, you just need to not worry about it not getting erect.
Of course, this is easier said than done. There are known cases when, several times with different partners, guys’ penises fell at the most inopportune moment. Some of them even began to doubt their traditional orientation, but this is a completely inadequate conclusion.
I screwed up in bed, what should I do? In such a situation, the guy has a very strong complex and it must be overcome. Some people on forums advise taking half a Viagra tablet before sex. Then, supposedly, the penis will stand in any case and after successful sex the excitement will disappear. In fact, sometimes even a pill doesn’t help with anxiety. The most practical advice is to catch yourself thinking about fear before the act, when you feel growing excitement. You need to pull yourself together and relax. This is sex with a girl, not a robbery! No one points a gun at you and threatens your life. You are here to have pleasure and give it to the lady.
Fear of a girl
Sometimes girls are too active in bed, or vice versa passive. In the first case, a man feels that he has screwed up in sex if he allowed a woman to control the process and practically did nothing himself. In the second case, you may feel that you are doing something wrong and the lady is not responding. In fact, the girl at this moment is most likely also thinking about herself
. How to make an impression, cope with your fears, etc.
What if I cum too quickly
This is one of the most common fears among men. And again, don't worry. All the problems are because of this. In the end, you always feel that you are close to orgasm. And in this mechanism the same muscles work as during urination. You can stop the flow and hold back when you need to, right? It's the same in sex. The process is controllable. If you really want to show that you can hold on for a long time, then it’s quite possible to do this.
But is it necessary? Do you know that many women don’t like long sex? Be yourself and put aside prejudices.
There are other tips on this matter. For example, the use of condoms and various lubricants with an anesthetic effect. Thanks to them, skin sensitivity is reduced and the possibility of prolonged sexual intercourse increases.
How to prepare for first sex
As mentioned above, you should only allow intimacy with a man if you are confident in your partner. In this case, we mean both the physical and moral aspects. Also remember that you need to take care of the safety of this event. Purchase the necessary protective equipment from unwanted pregnancy and infections at the pharmacy. Answer the question to yourself, what exactly is your fear associated with, what are you afraid of most? Share this problem with a friend who already has a similar experience, she will definitely help you with advice. Talk to your man, tell him what worries you, any problems in the relationship should be resolved together, because there should be no secrets between close people, especially in the intimate sphere. If you don't trust your boyfriend, then think hard about whether you should give yourself to him at all. Men, I would like to tell you to remember that sex is not only physical satisfaction, but above all care and attention to your beloved, especially when it comes to the first time. Try to show your openness to the lady, be yourself. Remember that for a girl, first sex is a turning point in her life, and high emotional shock is a normal reaction. Your task is to win over a woman so that she can relax as much as possible with you and feel wanted, loved and needed. Give her this and then you both will succeed.
Some tips for preparation
In order not to worry about the little things, there are some recommendations for preparing for the first sex:
- Don't be afraid of condoms. Put one in your pocket or next to the bed so you don't have to run around the room when the girl is already excited. It takes literally five seconds to open the package and put on the protective product.
- Before sex, go to the toilet and don't drink a lot of water. The urge to go to the toilet can interfere at the most inopportune times.
- Blowjob helps a lot to improve erection. If a girl agrees to oral sex, then this is a very good option.
There are no problems that cannot be overcome, with the exception of specific diseases.
First sex excites both the girl and the guy. This is absolutely normal and there is no need to worry about it. The main thing is to remember that everything arises in your head and watch your emotional state so as not to screw up in bed.
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Basic first time mistakes2
No matter how it sounds, there are mistakes when having sex for the first time, and there are many of them.
1. When having sex for the first time, a couple is haunted by awkwardness. It is expressed in clumsiness, embarrassment, excitement, etc. It ruins the sex experience. To avoid this, you should completely trust your partner, relax and have fun.
2. When having sex for the first time, you don’t need to try to experiment and go out of your way to impress your partner. This could end badly. Such emancipation will not be appropriate. If experiments are unavoidable, invite your partner to study and read the Kama Sutra together. Scrolling through the pages will already set you up for a wave of excitement. Moreover, you will show your partner that you are just like him and that this is the first time.
3. During sex, you should tell your partner what he likes and what he doesn’t like. This is the first time, and no one knows how to bring maximum pleasure to each other. There is no need to be shy and remain silent if it is unpleasant. If the girl is uncomfortable and she leaves it a secret, further sexual intercourse will only cause her suffering.
4. Don't forget about foreplay before and during sex. When having sex for the first time, foreplay is the key moment and starting point. If you neglect it, you won't be able to relax. A quick transition to sex can frighten a girl, and an inexperienced guy can cause at least physical pain. Therefore, during foreplay, you need to treat each other with tenderness and trepidation, then the transition to sex will be a natural, honest feeling between the partners.
5. You should remember about safety. Never forget about condoms. After all, the first experience with sex can end faster than expected and the likelihood of having children in a young, inexperienced couple becomes higher and higher. At this stage of the relationship, young people do not need this.
6. No need to lie and fake. When having sex for the first time, you need to act as natural and relaxed as possible. Pretending to be a queen or a macho is wrong and stupid. If you overplay, the process will be as uncomfortable as possible.
A hit parade of mistakes to avoid.
Still from the film “The 18-Year-Old Virgin”
Some guys view "virginity" as something shameful that they need to quickly get rid of in order to become a "full-fledged" adult, and in their rush to free themselves from this status, guys can potentially stumble in a few different ways.
Whether you're nervously anticipating your "first time" now, or it's something you did years ago, you'll probably want to know five common mistakes men can make when having sex for the first time.
